Nathan E. Lewis

Once upon a time I met a man named Love, who told me that he was an identical twin. We met in the flower of our youth hopeful in romance, seeking the loves of our lives. Love and I went about our courting in quite a different order. Love would ask a girl to dinner and a movie. At the table he would make it clear up front that he desired to get to know her to determine whether or not she would be the woman of his dreams. He peppered their dinner conversation with many a question, getting to know her through, what I would consider to be more of an interview than pleasant dialogue. Admittedly, I was a bit naive in those days. I would meet a girl and say, “Wow! Here is the girl of my dreams!” Then, I would sit at the table to discover as much as I was able about this amazing creature. Continue reading »

Chapter Two

Chapter Three
On a sunny afternoon the three little pigs ventured a visit to town to the loft of their urbanite uncle living in the penthouse suite overlooking the river. They told him of their fear and he highly recommended to them the hypnotist in town. He told them of his own fear of H1N1. This hypnotist, Dr. Bo Vine had successfully connected him to points in his past and in his subconscious, the seeds of his fear, helping him to face them and properly deal with them. Continue reading »

(Recently, I uncovered this Chapter 2, previously unknown to the world, proving that the final paragraph of Chapter 1, is not original but added at a later date by someone other than the author. The pigs dancing around the piano and singing, “Who’s afraid of the big, bad wolf,” and the final statement, “And they lived happily ever after,” are added. These additions do not match Chapter 2, which I now unveil to you.)

The three little pigs stared in horror at the dead wolf in the cauldron, the flames still licking the iron. With great effort they pulled it free and dragged the carcass across the clean and tidy room, out the front door, across the yard to the foot of the mulberry tree. Huffing and puffing the three little pigs dug a shallow grave, rolling the wolf into it, then covering it with dirt. They piled stones into a crude pyramid as high as they stood to ever remind them of their arch enemy.

None of the three little pigs slept the first night. At breakfast, prepared by the third little pig, they found it difficult to speak to one another, though they were brothers. Now that the wolf was dead, should the three of them live together in the house made of bricks? Or, should the first little pig and the second little pig rebuild their homes? Should they use hay and sticks? Should they use bricks? The first little pig said, “Do you think that the wolf is actually dead?” The second little pig said, “His body is dead, but do you think that his spirit will haunt us?” The third little pig said, “What makes you think that he is the only wolf out there?” Continue reading »

I know a man who has become so sick and tired of his habitual sin that he has taken drastic measures. He has taken to wearing a blindfold. He cuffs his hands, wears a chastity belt (his wife is keeper of the keys) and he shackles his feet. He hires a retired mendicant (they work for almost nothing) to read the Holy Scriptures to him, as his blindfold prevents him from doing his own reading. He reports that as long as he is subject to these constraints, he has not fallen to his habitual sins. He tells me that the Word of God has been the cause of the cessation of his sin. When I mention his cuffs, shackles, blindfold, and belt, he quickly insists that the Bible has provided all of these for his prevention of his sin. He is wearing these in obedience to the Word of God. He listens to the monk read and he does his best to memorize as much as he can, hiding the very Words of God so that he might not sin against God.
He has even memorized Psalm 119:105, “Thy Word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.” I asked him if he had been doing much walking lately. “No, no I haven’t. When I get up and out of these shackles, I get into trouble. No I haven’t been on the path for a very long time. If I am going to stay away from sin, then I need to stay right here in my room, close to my Bible reading monk.” I told him I found it interesting that this memorized verse about the law of God enlightening our common life encouraged us to get up and out into the world where the Word of God could be applied to anything we might encounter. “Oh no! I am too sinful and weak for the world. I need to stay right here with my blindfold over my eyes, listening to the Word of God.”
“OK,” I said. “I am returning to the world now and when I return, I hope to find you in good health and spirits.” Continue reading »

Pagan: So, you are standing outside the museum today protesting the featured exhibit of NEA art?
Christian: It’s an abomination to my God and to my faith.
Pagan: I think that would be its purpose. There are a few of us around who don’t particularly revere your God or share your faith.
Christian: Does that give you the right to publicly desecrate God? What about freedom of religion?
Pagan: I believe that the exhibit is protected by the freedom of speech. By the way, what kind of art do you like?
Christian: Oh, I’m not much interested in art. This is the first time I’ve been to this museum.
Pagan: You mean, this is the first time you have actually stood on the steps of the museum. Give me some examples of 20th century art produced by your Church that would make a fine exhibition in this museum.
Christian: (pregnant pause) I don’t rightly know of any. Our church doesn’t encourage the arts.
Pagan: By the way, most of the art in this museum, the featured NEA exhibit excepted, was patronized by the Church in past centuries. You should go inside sometime soon, I mean, after the NEA art is gone. Here’s a complimentary pass to use at any time.
Continue reading »